Romance writers’ conferences aren’t just about scribbling notes and pretending to listen—they’re an excuse to escape your writing cave, wear real clothes (hello, jeans!), and mingle with people who also spend their days inventing swoon-worthy fictional characters. Whether you’re there to soak up wisdom, pitch your masterpiece, or make some writerly friends, these events are where bookish people come out to play.
The Colourful Characters You'll Meet (and Avoid)
Let’s be honest, conferences aren’t just about learning—they’re about the people-watching. Who needs a new plot idea when you’ve got real-life characters right in front of you? Let’s dive into the parade of personalities you’ll inevitably meet:
The Big-Name Author (aka The Rockstar)
They’ve made it. You know it, they know it. They’re the ones with crowds hanging on their every word. While they drop pearls of wisdom, you’re secretly wondering if they’ve ever had imposter syndrome like the rest of us. Spoiler alert: they probably have. And after the panel, you’ll find them nursing a glass of Chardonnay, happily gabbing about their latest obsession with enemies-to-lovers plots.
The Hipster Writer (aka Trendsetter Extraordinaire)
They're the ones making you feel like a relic because they’re writing about romance set in virtual realities or featuring AI love interests. Over coffee (organic, obviously), they’ll casually mention their Twitter feud about why traditional romance needs a serious facelift. You’ll leave feeling both inspired and slightly inadequate.
The Old-School Romantic (aka Time Traveller)
You’ll find this one at the cocktail hour, sipping a martini and wistfully talking about moonlit walks and handwritten letters (which somehow seem sexier when they describe them). They’ll make you want to dust off your quill and write a Regency romance. Just don’t mention texting in front of them—it might cause a fainting spell.
The Starry-Eyed Newbie (aka The Adorable Sponge)
They’re easy to spot—they’re clutching a notebook like it’s their lifeline, wide-eyed at every piece of advice. They might seem shy, but give them a few minutes (or a glass of wine), and they’ll be pitching you their next five-book series about time-travelling pirates. Their enthusiasm is infectious, even if it makes you feel like a jaded veteran in comparison.
The Genre Blender (aka The Rebel)
Romance with a dash of sci-fi? Sure. Add in a murder mystery? Why not. These are the folks who don’t play by the rules, and they’re here to convince you to do the same. They’ll have you thinking about splicing genres over a dinner conversation that veers from discussing plot twists to arguing about whether vampires belong in romance. Spoiler: they totally do.
The Social Butterfly (aka The Networking Ninja)
They’ll start the day quietly, maybe even blending in with the crowd, but by the evening social? They’re at the centre of the room, glass in hand, collecting business cards like Pokémon. They’re fun, chatty, and will convince you that you, too, can be an extrovert (until you retreat to your hotel room for a nap).
The Silent Observer (aka The Mystery Writer in Disguise)
You won’t see much of them at first—likely because they’ve found the cosiest corner with a cup of tea. But don’t be fooled; they’re quietly soaking up every moment and mentally turning everyone they meet into their next characters. Approach with caution—they’re probably plotting your fictional demise as you speak.
How to Make the Most of It (Without Having a Meltdown)
So, you’ve signed up for a romance writers’ conference, and now you’re wondering how to survive it without embarrassing yourself. Here’s the trick: have fun and don’t overthink it. Yes, you’ll learn stuff, and yes, you’ll meet cool people, but really, it’s about having a laugh, sharing a drink, and realising that even the most successful authors are just as weird as you.
Whether you’re debating tropes over a bottle of wine, dancing awkwardly at the after-party, or secretly wishing you could skip straight to the dessert table, these are the moments that make the experience. So, embrace the chaos, laugh at the awkward moments, and remember, that next glass of wine might just lead to your next great story idea (or at least a funny anecdote).
Because in the end, we’re all here for the same reason: to create, connect, and maybe—just maybe—find a new writing buddy who loves cheesy romance as much as you do.
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